For every female who exhibits this disorder, there are 20 males who do, so most of this discussion will revolve around men. A fetish is defined as erotic or sexual significance being projected onto some (ordinarily!) nonsexual inanimate object. Targets of fetishists' desire can include shoes, stockings, jockstraps, underwear and practically anything not typically considered to [...]
Gay men and Open Relationships Dear Attitude, I was having sex with my boyfriend one night when he drunkenly suggested getting a third party in for a threesome – and I went bananas. I’ve always made it clear that I would never, ever consider it. I know that it often splits relationships up, and I just [...]
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When we think of a “mixed marriage,” we typically imagine two individuals of different races or religions. But the mixed-orientation marriage—with one straight spouse and one who’s gay or lesbian—is just as real, though far more likely to operate underground. This long-shrouded partnership burst into public view in August 2004, when New Jersey Governor James McGreevey [...]
Do You Know Your Hospital’s Hospitality? In March, 2009, at 5:00 AM, I woke to find that Mike, my partner of 16 years, was not in bed. I heard a hard thump from upstairs, then another thump. Running to our kitchen, I found Mike on the floor, bleeding from several gashes in [...]
MISANDRY: The Other Side of Misogyny I’m sorry mama! I never meant to hurt you! I never meant to make you cry but tonight I’m cleaning out my closet. —lyrics to Eminem’s “Cleaning Out My Closet (I’m Sorry, Mama)” Eminem went where no son has publicly gone before—or is allowed [...]
According to the Oxford English Dictionary , a cuckold is “a derisive name for the husband of an unfaithful wife.” The concept of being a cuckold is that a man’s wife or girlfriend is interested in being with another man, usually because she complains of not being sexually satisfied by her husband or boyfriend. Often the [...]
The concept of Response-Ability comes from Rick Carson’s “Taming Your Gremlin”. Our interactions with others are dependent on our taking responsibility for our reactions and our responses to what is seen and heard. It is inappropriate to just react and say and do hurtful things to someone out of reactivity. This can only make the problem [...]
Gay male couples feel a lot of pressure to remain sexually fresh, new, and exciting. That’s the popular stereotype. “All gay men love sex and have it a lot” trumpets the popular press. “If I were gay,” straight men joke, “I would be having sex all the time with my partner! Guys always want it!” So [...]
Paul, a slim, attractive, 29-year-old white man who owns a landscaping company, was referred to me by his therapist (with whom he was making no progress) shortly after he attempted suicide. He told me that eight months previously, Julie, his fiancée, had discovered that he'd been having unprotected anal sex with men. When she confronted him, [...]