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Psychotherapy Networker Symposium
March 25-28, 2010
Omni Shoreham Hotel
Washington, D.C.
Treatment Issues with Gay & Lesbian Couples
As a straight clinician, it's important to be gay informed, more than just gay-friendly. It's especially important to recognize the differences between the relationship dynamics of gay male and female couples. In this workshop, we'll compare the distinct differences in relationship dynamics and problem areas that arise for gay men and for lesbians: responsible sexual practices and the need for more connectedness among gay male couples and diminished sexual desire and the need for separateness among lesbians are just a few. You'll leave with specific interventions and assessment tools that promote gay-affirmative couples therapy.
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What’s So Bad about Porn?
Helping Couples in Conflict about the Use of Pornography
Tammy Nelson and Joe Kort
Even though Internet porn has become ubiquitous in our society, many of us (including therapists) still tend to view its use as a symptom of sexual addiction or deviancy, a form of marital infidelity, and/or a serious threat to the relationship. But there are multiple reasons that people use porn, and it can have many meanings. In this workshop, you’ll learn how to help couples face and weather the immediate crisis when a spouse discovers that the other spouse (usually the man) is secretly using pornography. We’ll explore how to help couples depathologize the issue and investigate what it means in terms of three basic reasons most men seek it out, as well as potential problems associated with each. We’ll talk about helping the spouses develop empathy and validation for each other and, finally, create a more differentiated sex life together, which balances shared intimacy and privacy.
Tammy Nelson, M.S., is the founder and executive director of the Center for Healing. She’s the author of Getting the Sex You Want and What’s Eating You?
Joe Kort, L.M.S.W., specializes in individual, couples, and group psychotherapy for gay and straight clients. He’s the author of Gay Affirmative Therapy for the Straight Clinician.
MaleSurvivor’s Twelfth International Conference.
New York City on March 18 – 21, 2010.
Conference is “Healing and Hope for Male Survivors.”
LOCATION: John Jay College of Criminal Justice
- Straight Guise: Treating Sexually Abused Heterosexual Men Who Have Sex With Men
- Mommy Nearest: Mother-Son Incest and Its Impact on Adult Males
Straight Guise: Treating Sexually Abused Heterosexual Men Who Have Sex With Men
Brief description:
Sexual abuse can lead to homosexual behavioral imprinting as an adult. While it does not lead to a gay or bisexual orientation, men will re-enact their original abuse by “returning to the scene of the crime” and engage in the same types of sexual acts which were done to them as children by male perpetrators.
Abstract:
When a male client reveals he fantasizes about and even has compulsory sex with men, the tendency is to label the client as gay or bisexual. However, for many of these men this is not about either. A variety of reasons exist as to why straight men seek other men for sex which are not about a gay identity with the top reason being childhood sexual abuse. Therapists, being politically correct, often believe the man is in denial about his homosexuality or bisexuality and move him in a direction toward coming out gay when--in fact--he is not. This presentation will discuss ways to understand the heterosexual male client's interest in sexual contact with men, and helping him decide what course of treatment is best for him.
Identify 3 learning objectives for your audience
- Understand the psychological trauma embedded in the arousal template of the straight men who have sex with men (MSM's) who are not gay or bisexual.
- Learn to help the client communicate an understanding of the relationships between his sexual abuse and sexual contact with other men.
- Address the confusion, fears, homophobia, and anxieties of these clients about their sexual orientation as a result of their sexual behaviors and interest in engaging in sexual activity with other men.
Mommy Nearest: Mother-Son Incest and Its Impact on Adult Males
Brief description:
Mother-son incest is so taboo that very little information exists on this topic. This workshop focuses on the specific symptoms men experience as a result of covert and overt sexual abuse by their mothers and how to work on repairing the damage to their self-esteem and their relationships.
Abstract:
There is a plethora if information on father-daughter incest and the negative effects of this trauma on females. However, the same is not true about mother-son incest and yet clinicians are seeing this in their offices every day. Mothers who sexually abuse do so in different ways than do fathers in terms of covertness, seduction and under the guise of caring as a mother. In knowing how mothers sexually abuse and the psychosocial and sexual symptoms that show up in the therapists office from male clients clinicians will be able to treat their clients more effectively.
Objectives for talk:
- Understand the long-term impact of mother-son incest on the male survivors by identifying the symptoms in male clients.
- Learn the various ways mothers sexually abuse their sons both covert and overt: those that are similar and different from the ways fathers sexually abuse.
- Recognizing the dysfunctional sexual behavioral symptoms and interpersonal problems in relationships to partners resulting from mother-son incest.
Joe Kort Book Signing
June 26, 2009, 7 p.m.
EVERYbody reads is very pleased to announce that Michigan author and counselor, Joe Kort will be coming to our store on Saturday, June 26th to discuss his books.
Gay Affirmative Therapy for the Straight Clinician
Download pdf
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
9:00 am – 3:30 pm
Presenter:
Joe Kort, MA, MSW, LMSW
Learning Objectives: Participants will:
- Understand psychological trauma of growing up gay and lesbian.
- Recognize stages of coming out.
- Develop treatment skills in dealing with the trauma and different stages of coming out.
Target Audience/Social Work Practice Levels:
This course is appropriate for all mental health and helping professionals.
Agenda:
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
I. Registration; Sign-in; Refreshments (8:30 am)
II. Program Begins (9:00 am)
III. Psychological Consequences of heterosexism and homophobia
IV. Lunch
V. Trauma of growing up gay and lesbian
VI. Treatment of gays and lesbians
VII.
Program ends; Evaluations; Sign-Out; Attendance Certificates (3:30 pm)
Course Fee: $85
This fee includes lunch and refreshments in addition to
program registration, program materials and a certificate
of course attendance for each individual participant
attending the entire program.
Payment Options:
* Cash (please do not send cash in the mail);
* Check (business, personal, cashier or money order,
made out to Jewish Family Service). JFS will issue a
$15.00 service charge for returned checks;
* Visa or MasterCard
To register for this program, please choose one of
the following options:
*Call Stephanie Appel directly at 248-592-2667. If
Stephanie is not available, she will return your phone call
in a timely manner to obtain your registration information.
*Email Stephanie Appel directly at sappel@jfsdetroit.org.
Email messages will receive a response as soon as possible,
verifying that the registration information has been
received.
*Mail in the registration to:
Stephanie Appel, LMSW - Jewish Family Service
6555West Maple Road,West Bloomfield, MI 48322
Registrations can be faxed to: 248-592-2340,
attn: Stephanie Appel
To guarantee a seat, if the program is not filled by the
time of your registration, the registration deadline is:
3 business days before a scheduled program.
If the initial payment was made by cash or check, Jewish
Family Service will issue a refund check. If the initial payment
was made by credit card, the refund will be issued
to the card. There will be a $5 fee for all cancellations and
refunds.
41st Annual AASECT Conference in Phoenix, Arizona
Saturday May 16, 2009 at 2:00 p.m
Straight Guise: Treating Heterosexual Men Who Have Sex With Men
Joe Kort, LMSW
1. Description of Training
When a male client reveals he fantasizes about having sex with men, is caught looking at online gay porn and in gay chat rooms, and possibly is having sex with men, the tendency is to label the client as gay or bisexual. However, for many of these men this is not about either. A variety of reasons exist as to why men seek other men for sex which are not about a gay identity. Therapists, being politically correct, often believe the man is in denial about his homosexuality or bisexuality and move him in a direction toward coming out gay when--in fact--he is not. This presentation will discuss ways understanding the male client’s interest in sexual contact with men, and helping him decide what course of treatment is best for him.
2. Bibliographic references for talk:
A. Mending A Shattered Heart: A Guide for Partners of Sex Addicts A Gentle Press edited by Stephanie Carnes, Ph.D.
B. Psychotherapy Networker Magazine Gay Guise: What To Do When Your Client Has Sex With Men, But Is Straight was a case study article for therapists working with men who have sex with men (MSM) and are heterosexual.
C. On the Down Low: A Journey into the Lives of “Straight” Black Men Who Sleep with Men by J.L. King
D. Beyond the Down Low: Sex, Lies, and Denial in Black America by Keith Boyken
3. Objectives for talk:
- Understand the psychological meanings of the arousal template of the straight men who seek sex with men (MSM's) who are not gay or bisexual.
- Learn to help the client communicate an understanding about his sexuality and to understand what the behavior means for him.
- Address the fears, homophobia, anxieties and insecurities of these clients about their sexual behaviors and interest in engaging in sexual activity with other men.
Becoming the Men They Were Meant to Be: Helping Sexually Abused Males
Thursday, June 4, 2009
1:00 pm – 4:00 pm
Jewish Family Service of Metropolitan Detroit
6555 West Maple Road, West Bloomfield, MI 48322
Contact: Stephanie Appel 248-592-2667 or sappel@jfsdetroit.org
Presenter:
Joe Kort, MA, MSW, LMSW
Psychotherapist, coach and author Joe Kort, MA, MSW, LMSW has been in practice since 1985. He specializes in Gay Affirmative Psychotherapy as well as IMAGO Relationship Therapy, which is a specific program involving communication exercises designed for couples to enhance their relationship and for singles to learn relationship skills. It is based on the books Getting The Love You Want and Keeping The Love You Find by Dr. Harville Hendrix.
Joe also specializes in sexual addiction, responsible non-monogamy/monogamy, childhood sexual, physical and emotional abuse, chemical dependency, mixed-orientation marriages, sexual shadow, coming out, depression and anxiety. He offers workshops for couples and singles. He runs a gay men's group therapy and a men's sexuality group therapy for straight, bi and gay men who are struggling with specific sexual issues. His therapy services are for gays and lesbians as well as heterosexuals. Joe's practice is mixed with straight, gay, lesbian and bi-attractional individuals and couples.
Learning Objectives:
Approximately one in six boys is sexually abused before age 16. Often males who have been sexually traumatized and/or abused behaviorally act out with affairs, have sexual identity confusion, cannot commit to partners, display hypersexuality and sexual anorexia and so on. Therapists will learn how to differentiate which types of abuse cause which type of sexual and intimacy problems in their clients’ lives, and how to assess this in therapy. Therapists will also learn the differences between overt and covert sexual abuse and the different ways these manifest in their clients’ lives.
- This course will review the common categories and scenarios of sexually abused men and how to identify indicators.
- Participants will learn about the different manifestations presented when the perpetrator is male vs. female.
- This course will initiate discussion and present clinical implications in the context of treating sexually abused men who are acting out.
Target Audience/Social Work Practice Levels:
This course is appropriate for all mental health and helping professionals.
Agenda:
May 15, 2009
I. Registration; Sign-in; Refreshments (8:30 am)
II. Program Begins (9:00 am)
III. Overt vs. covert sexual abuse
IV. Differences between men sexually abused by men and those sexually abused by women
V. Treatment of sexual abuse survivor
VI. Program ends; Evaluations; Sign-Out; Attendance Certificates (12:00 pm)
32nd Annual Networker Symposium
5135 MacArthur Blvd., N.W., Washington, DC 20016
March 26th - 29th, 2008
Sexual Disorientation: Finding a True Sexual Identity
Joe Kort, LMSW
When clients express confusion about their own sexuality or sexual identity, it’s tempting for therapists to move quickly to help them determine whether they fit into the categories of “gay,” “straight,” or “bisexual.” Too often, however, this exploration isn’t grounded in an understanding of the significant differences between sexual orientation, sexual fantasy, and sexual behavior. In this workshop, we’ll examine specific questions and interventions that can gently lead confused clients to a clearer recognition of their authentic sexual identity--where thoughts, fantasies, and behaviors work in concert. You’ll discover how to address the fears, homophobia, and anxieties these clients have about their sexual behavior, and how to help them understand their own sexuality and recognize the right lifestyle for themselves. We’ll also discuss therapists’ countertransference on these issues.
Learning Objectives
- Provide language to frame the bisexual identity and help clients discover their own reality around their sexual orientation
- Discuss the differences between bisexual behavior as a stage, pathology and symptomatic of childhood trauma and abuse versus a true identity
- Address therapist countertransference issues regarding dealing with clients who are attracted to both sexes
Therapy with Sexually Abused Males
Joe Kort, LMSW
About one in six boys is sexually abused before age 16. Often, as adults, males who have been sexually traumatized or abused act out with affairs, experience sexual-identity confusion, display hypersexuality or sexual anorexia, and can’t emotionally commit to partners. In this workshop, you’ll learn how to differentiate between types of abuse and the problems of sexuality and intimacy they cause, as well as how to assess these issues in the therapy session. We’ll explore different categories and scenarios of sexual abuse, the issues related to whether the perpetrator was male or female, the distinctions between covert and overt sexual abuse, and the implications for these possibilities in therapy.
Learning Objectives
- Discuss the long-term impact of mother-son incest on the male survivors by identifying the symptoms in male clients
- List the various ways mothers sexually abuse their sons both covert and overt: those that are similar and different from the ways fathers sexually abuse
- Recognizing the dysfunctional sexual symptoms and interpersonal problems in relationships to partners in marriages resulting from mother-son incest
Learn at least 3 treatment modalities when working with this population.
Gay Affirmative Therapy for the Straight Clinician
January 15, 2009
Sponsored by Jewish Family Services of Metropolitan Detroit
Cost: $65 (includes breakfast)
Thursday, January 15, 2009
9am–12pm,
3.0 CE Clock Hours/Contact Hours
Location: Glen Oaks
30500 West 13 Mile Road
Farmington Hills, MI 48334
To register for a workshop, please contact Stephanie Appel at 248-592-2667 or sappel@jfsdetroit.org. Registration forms can be mailed to JFS at 6555 West Maple Road, West Bloomfield, MI 48322 or faxed to 248-592-2340.
Agenda:
I. Registration; Sign-In; Refreshments (8:30 am)
II. Program Begins (9:00 am)
III. Psychological Consequences of heterosexism
and homophobia
IV. Trauma of growing up gay and lesbian
V. Treatment of gays and lesbians
VI. Program Ends
Learning Objectives:
Participants will:
- Understand psychological trauma of growing up gay and
lesbian
- Recognize stages of coming out
- Develop treatment skills in dealing with the trauma and
different stages of coming out
AASECT Sponsored Talk for Mental Health Clinicians
DATE:
November 1, 2008
TIME: 9:30AM Continental Breakfast--rolls, Danish, etc and coffee tea.
Presentation: 10-12 (including questions)
COST: $40 (which includes 2 AASECT CE’s and 2 Michigan Social Work CE’s plus a continental breakfast)
WHERE:
Center for Sexual Health at University of Michigan Health Systems
Ann Arbor, MI
East Ann Arbor Health Center
4260 Plymouth Road
Ann Arbor, MI 48109
just off the highway (us 23)
Contact: Sallie Foley salliefoley@gmail.com
Straight Guise: Treating Heterosexual Men Who Have Sex With Men
Joe Kort, LMSW
1. Description of Training
When a male client reveals he fantasizes about having sex with men, is caught looking at online gay porn and in gay chat rooms, and possibly is having sex with men, the tendency is to label the client as gay or bisexual. However, for many of these men this is not about either. A variety of reasons exist as to why men seek other men for sex which are not about a gay identity. Therapists, being politically correct, often believe the man is in denial about his homosexuality or bisexuality and move him in a direction toward coming out gay when--in fact--he is not. This presentation will discuss ways understanding the male client’s interest in sexual contact with men, and helping him decide what course of treatment is best for him.
2. Bibliographic references for talk:
A. Mending A Shattered Heart: A Guide for Partners of Sex Addicts A Gentle Press edited by Stephanie Carnes, Ph.D.
B. Psychotherapy Networker Magazine
Gay Guise: What To Do When Your Client Has Sex With Men, But Is Straight was a case study article for therapists working with men who have sex with men (MSM) and are heterosexual.
C. On the Down Low: A Journey into the Lives of “Straight” Black Men Who Sleep with Men by J.L. King
D. Beyond the Down Low: Sex, Lies, and Denial in Black America by Keith Boyken
3. Objectives for talk:
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Understand the psychological meanings of the arousal template of the straight men who seek sex with men (MSM's) who are not gay or bisexual.
-
Learn to help the client communicate an understanding about his sexuality and to understand what the behavior means for him.
-
Address the fears, homophobia, anxieties and insecurities of these clients about their sexual behaviors and interest in engaging in sexual activity with other men.
SASH Conference "Creating a Culture of Healthy Sexuality:
Healing and Honor"
September 18-21, 2008
WORKSHOP TITLE: MSM: Men who have Sex with Men (but aren’t gay?)
(70 minute workshop)
Presenters:
Joe Kort, LMSW
Licensed Clinical Social Worker
Description:
This workshop explores the various reasons why men, who do not identify as gay, may have sex with men. The workshop will also include qualitative data gathered from partners of sex addicts who are MSM. A discussion of clinical implications in the context of sex addiction treatment of addicts, partners and the couple will be initiated.
Abstract:
This workshop focuses on MSM, men who have sex with men. While this sexual classification is emerging and becoming more prominent in both the academic and clinical realms, many health care professionals are still largely confused and unaware of some of the complexities and scenarios that exist among a population that does not fit neatly into the over-simplified understandings that traditionally exist around sexual orientation, sexual identity, sexual attraction and sexual pathology. Other than simply being “in the closet”, the presentation reviews some of the common scenarios and categories of men who fall into the emerging sexual classification of MSM, who may not identify as gay. The workshop will then shift to present qualitative research data gathered from partners of sex addicts who are MSM. Attention will be given to the some of the particular struggles of women whose partners have sex with men. Finally, clinical implications will be presented, particularly within the context of sexual addiction and compulsivity treatment with specific focus and guidelines for treating the addict (MSM), his partner and the couple.
Objectives:
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To review the common categories and scenarios of MSM who do not identify as gay.
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To present qualitative research data from partners of sex addicts who are MSM.
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To initiate discussion and present clinical implications in the context of treating sex addicts who are MSM, his partner, and the couple.
Please join us to celebrate the release of Joe’s NEW book:
gay affirmative therapy
for the straight clinician
THE ESSENTIAL GUIDE
Published by WW Norton Books
Click here for a pdf invitation
Date: Friday, June 13th, 2008
Place: Affirmations LGBT Community Center
290 W. Nine Mile Rd., Ferndale, MI 48220
Time: 5:00 pm ~ 9:00 pm
Joe will be reading from his new book at: 6:00 pm and 7:30 pm
R.S.V.P. is appreciated but not required to sponsors:
Eleanor Payson, MSW: (248)548- 0306
Sally Palaian, Ph.D.: (248)645-5960
Linda Moody, MSW: (734)662-0761
Nancy Sparrow, MSW: (248)336-920
Getting to the Heart of the Matter with Gay & Lesbian
Clients
with Joe Kort, LCSW
Nationally known author, educator, & gay Therapist
“It’s not enough to be gay-friendly. It’s not enough
to be gay yourself. You must be gay informed!”......Joe
Kort
This 2-day Seminar is based on Joe’s latest book,
Gay Affirmative Therapy for the Straight Clinician:
The Essential Guide
More information, seminar description, & a downloadable
registration form are available at
www.grits.cloverpad.org or call 404-316-7692.
Click here to download information in pdf format.
Georgia Regional Imago Therapists present...
What: 2-day Seminar on Gay Affirmative Therapy
with Joe Kort
When: May 2 & 3, 2008, 9am - 5pm
Where: Country Inn & Suites hotel, I - 75 & Windy
Hill Road
Info:
www.grits.cloverpad.org or call 404-316-7692
* Gain new understanding of special clinical issues
* Examine attitudes & myths that can get in the way of
effective therapy
* Leave with specific interventions & assessment tools
that promote gay-affirmative therapy (GAT) with
individuals & same sex couples
* 12 CEUs applied for
Psychotherapy Networker Symposium
East
March 13-16, 2008
Omni Shoreham Hotel
Washington, D.C.
Click here for specific dates and times of Joe's
workshops.
You must register for the entire symposium to attend the
workshop.
Unfree To Be Me: Preventing and Healing the Abuse of
Gay Youth
Many therapists ask, “How can you tell if a child or
teenager is gay or lesbian?” There is no rule of thumb
nor any scientific literature that claims to know for
sure. But the gay clients in your office were once gay
children and teenager--and they will tell you that for
sure. The trauma done to the neglect and abuse of these
children is profound. Therapists have an opportunity to
help these children and their families to reduce the
amount of psychological damage that is done through
neglect, bullying and lack of acceptance.
This workshop will focus on how to address children and
teenagers who self-identify as gay or lesbian and their
families.
Learning Objectives:
- Identity ways to help gay and lesbian children and teenagers.
- Address therapist's anxiety around how to ask and address a child/teenager's homosexuality.
- Learn ways to help parents cope with having a gay child as well as helping the child cope with unaccepting parents.
When Gay Guise Happens to Straight Marriages
When a male spouse in a heterosexual marriage reveals he
fantasizes about having sex with men, is caught looking
at online gay porn and in gay chat rooms, and possibly
is having sex with men, women--and these men--often
worry that he is gay and that the marriage needs to end.
However, for many of these men this is not about
gayness. A variety of reasons exist as to why men seek
other men for sex which are not about a gay identity.
Some of these men wish to engage in sexual contact with
their wives which she will not do. He believes his
sexual contact with men is "not cheating". Therapists,
being politically correct, often believe the man is in
denial about his homosexuality and move him in a
direction toward coming out gay when--in fact--he is
not.
In this workshop, we'll discuss ways of dealing with the
reactivity of the "betrayed" wife, confronting our own
and the couple's homophobia, understand the male's
interest in sexual contact with men, and helping the
couple decide what course is best for them.
- Understand the psychological meaning of the arousal
template of the men who seek sex with men (MSM's) who
are not gay or bisexual.
- Learn to help the couple communicate in non-reactive
ways about sexuality and to understand what the behavior
means and how it impacts the marriage.
- Address the fears, anxieties and insecurities of
these wives about her husband's sexual interests and how
to help her listen effectively to him without it being
personalized.
Sexual Shadow: Gay Men and Sexual
Desire
A Workshop with Joe Kort
Columbia University, New York City
Wallach Lounge | Corner of Amsterdam and 114th |
Map
Free Dinner
March 22, 2007 •
6:00 PM
Click here to RSVP.
Join Joe Kort in a course on "Gay men
and their Sexual Shadow Workshop". The workshop will
teach the concepts and tools of gay men’s erotic
blueprints. Participants will learn how to resolve the
mystery of their sexual fantasies and desires and how
that contributes to finding the perfect mate.
The workshop is interactive involving
all participants. This workshop will use guided imagery,
lecture, group participation and experiential exercises
and writing, video clips and more.
For more information about attending the
workshop contact Kerry John Poynter, M.A. at
212.854.1675 or by
eMail.
Psychotherapy Networker Symposium
East
March 15-18, 2007
Omni Shoreham Hotel
Washington, D.C.
Click here for specific dates and times of Joe's
workshops.
You must register for the entire symposium to attend the
workshop.
Treatment Issues with Gay & Lesbian Couples
As a straight clinician, it's important to be gay
informed, more than just gay-friendly. It's especially
important to recognize the differences between the
relationship dynamics of gay male and female couples. In
this workshop, we'll compare the distinct differences in
relationship dynamics and problem areas that arise for
gay men and for lesbians: responsible sexual practices
and the need for more connectedness among gay male
couples and diminished sexual desire and the need for
separateness among lesbians are just a few. You'll leave
with specific interventions and assessment tools that
promote gay-affirmative couples therapy.
The New Mixed Marriage: When Gay Happens to Straight
Couples
When one spouse in a heterosexual marriage reveals he or
she is gay, profound emotional, ethical, and practical
dilemmas arise for both the couple and the therapist.
The couple often struggles with feelings of betrayal and
shame, along with a sense of being caught in a bind
between anguished love and hopelessness. In this
situation, therapists are often too quick to recommend
divorce. In this workshop, we'll discuss ways of dealing
with the reactivity of the "betrayed" spouse,
confronting our own and the couple's homophobia,
alleviating the gay spouse's guilt, and helping the
couple decide what course is best for them. We'll
explore the reasons gays and lesbians marry and how to
help the couple move forward without blame or
defensiveness. We'll also discuss what "coming out"
stages are necessary, both for the couple and for each
partner, if there's to be a successful "mixed marriage."
Joe's Recent Speaking Engagements
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